Mummy had a Meltdown

Two days ago I had a mummy meltdown. I call it this because it sounds better {to me} than, I lost my shit! I want to be writing about our fun day out at the beach, splash park and all the adventures along the way, which hopefully I will once I’ve shifted this weird combo of guilt and shame {yep I said it} that I’m feeling.

I haven’t had one of these moments for a long time and I’m not really sure where it came from, but I think it was a mixture of: Toddler tantrums + pmt + sunshine + tired toddler + gritty sand – clothes & nappy = A Mummy meltdown

Phoebe loves water, she’s almost obsessed with it, most of her recent temper tantrums have been water based, so I wasn’t surprised when we ended up getting a full blown frantic tanty on the beach. I had already changed Phoebe out of soaking wet clothes about 15 minutes before, after some great fun at the splash park. She was dripping wet, but the sun was out so it didn’t matter and I had packed plenty of clothes for this exact thing. I managed to change her without too much fuss but pretty much straight away, she of course ran back over to the splash part of the park! I only had one more change of clothes…a dress and wanted to use that after some beach play. So I plonked her safely in her buggy with the promise of a lollol. This worked and it meant her little friend could carry on playing for another 10 minutes while Phoebe had some chill time. After about 11 minutes she started to loose it, so we packed up, left the park and quickly shove an ice cream in her face.

The next 5 minutes were heaven, I could enjoy my nobly bobbly {just fancied one} whilst looking out over the sea to the soundtrack of two toddlers who were throughly enjoying their ice creams. The mood didn’t last long as Phoebe obviously finished first then wanted her friends, as he was still quietly eating his, luckily I distracted her with the water, some selfie’s and letting her know we were going to go play on the beach very soon.

We made our way down the the beach by doing the backwards sand walk with the strollers and unloaded. It was all going so well, Phoebe was digging happily with the slightly wet sand {it has rained that day} jumping up and down, rolling and generally being the confident soul that she is. 15 minutes in, she had noticed the sea and was off, which is fine as I knew this would happen and normally when daddy pig is with us, they throw stones and have a little splash. Today Phoebe was feeling a little more adventurous, stone throwing  wasn’t cutting the mustard, she wanted in! I whipped her leggings off, let her wonder in and then once she got to knee height I lifted her up and dunked her legs, making it into a game as the waves came in!

Again it was all going fine until Phoebe wasn’t happy with me helping her, she started to wriggle and almost lunged out of my grip. At this point, I wish I had handled it differently. So, I ended up panicking, I shouted a little and got upset with her. I tried to explain it was dangerous to do that and that I needed to help her until she was bigger! This didn’t go down well, I tried walking up the beach to go back for more digging but as soon as I let go of her hand, she ran back to the waters edge and almost dived into the sea, I managed to grab her arm just before her face went in. We then wrestled/tussled about, Phoebe was completely wet, we had gritty sand all over both of us and she was lashing about like a demon child, doing her best Chewbacca impression. This is when I properly lost it. I scooped her up whilst ranting away, went back to our area, started to strip her off then attempted to remove as much sand/small stones from her as I could.

That was when she lost her shit, big time and started to grab handfuls of sand, rub it in her eyes, hair and at me. When I rubbed it out of her eyes and tried to calm her down she ended up biting her arm so badly out of angry and frustration, she then screamed with the pain. At the time I was so frustrated at her for just having to once again take things to the extreme and in my head, I couldn’t help thinking we’d now ruined what was a lovely play on the beach with friends.Luckily my mate realised I needed some back up quickly stepped in {my hero} cool as cucumber and together we somehow managed to stick a new nappy onto her sandy bum and breathe. We hugged it out, dried off the salty tears {from both of us} had another outfit change then chewy {Phoebe} had a nice calm couple of minutes in the stroller so I could gather my thoughts, pack away the wet belongings and do the sandy backwards walk of shame back up to reality.

I normally deal with these moment with more of humours side, try to breathe stay calm and smile, this was not one of those days and do you know what, I’m only human and just a normal parent who sometimes can’t keep the shouty ranty mum at bay and that’s okay with me. I chatted it out with daddy pig that night, making me feel much better about it all. I don’t feel guilty or regret the whole incident anymore {like I did} I’m just a bit pissed off at myself for not trying other methods or ways of dealing with the situation. I’m not going to dwell on it but I’m going to take away some valuable lessons and turn this into a positive by adding in some new techniques for temper tantrums, making sure i’m more aware of the current age milestones/ticks plus check when her next development leap is and finally try to take is all with a pinch of salt or in this case, sand as I don’t want “crazy beach mamma” coming out anytime soon.

Have you recently had a mummy meltdown? How did you deal with it afterwards, did you share you’re story like I did or keep quiet and move on?  Oh and I want to finish off with a hilarious photo, my friend made for me to see the funny side of my Chewbacca Child…

BHDW7629

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26 thoughts on “Mummy had a Meltdown

    1. Thanks babe, I totally agree. I regularly have a good old rant with my mummy mates and I think it helps to normalise the issues and not keep it bottled up (which I tend to do) and try and learn and move on! Thanks for reading, it was a bit on the longer side. X

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  1. ‘Two days ago I had a mummy meltdown. I call it this because it sounds better {to me} than, I lost my shit!’ Ha ha – what an opener! I hate when this happens – I’ve been there – you have the most amazing day planned and you think its going to be all gorgeous and scrummy and then boom – meltdown! I feel sometimes with my teens that I revert back to being an adolescent – so maybe toddlers cause mums to have tantrums and teens cause mums to have copies amounts of attitude – that’s my theory! #marvmondays

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    1. Thanks for such lovely comments, i really did loose it but I think it’s help me get back on track and realise it’s okay to have those not so wonderful day! I think you might be onto something with your theory, good luck and thanks for reading X

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  2. The occasional meltdown keeps you all on your toes, I am sure it’s nature’s way of clearing out the emotional cobwebs! Ha ha. We haven’t done playing on the beach yet as I know it will be bad enough with two grumpy sandy toddlers but if we throw a sand hating daddy into the mix…..well there isn’t enough chocolate in the world to balance that combination out. We will go soon though and I will remember this and try and stay calm (and take lots of changes of clothes) x

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    1. Yes I totally agree, its just little reminders in life eh! Lesson to be learnt everywhere and everyday 🙂 twins on the beach could be tough, but you always rock it out 🙂 take lots of clothes, wipes, towels and something I should have added, spare clothes for the parents!!! Good luck and thanks for reading X

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  3. Oh hun don’t worry we have all had them. Bless sounded very frustrating for you. My worst ever was a car journey and my daughter screamed for about 20 minutes coming home. I was on the hands free to hubby and I lost it and screamed Shut up at her like hysterically twice!! So bad…she screamed harder and I felt awful, Then she only wanted me when we got home. Never done it again. But we have all been there!!! xxx #marvmondays

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    1. Thanks for reading and leaving such nice comments. It hate that I shouted at her and she got so cross 😦 The bite mark has luckily gone down and she hasn’t left my side since..a big lesson for us both. X

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  4. Oh I had a full on mummy meltdown yesterday I’ve wrote about it on my blog. I feel silly saying it happens to all of us when I was so angry at myself for it happening to me. But it does. We are only human. Chin up chick we are all in this together! xxx

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    1. Thanks Hun, it’s horrible at the time and I felt like such a bad mum for shouting at her and making her so cross but I’m trying to not best myself up too much. Thanks for reading x

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    1. Thanks for reading and commenting 🙂 it is bloody hard work and sometimes I need to let loose and I wished it hadn’t been in public during a play date but hey I’m sure there will be more horrendous huffs along the way. X

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  5. Oh god, I empathise completely. If I panic when Archie does something or I think he’s hurt himself, I also react by shouting at him which is awful, it’s just the fear that makes me react that way. >_< I'm glad you're feeling better now because we definitely ALL experience this, trust me! All I seem to do is constantly wish I'd handled it a bit differently. Thanks for linking to #MarvMondays. Kaye xo

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    1. Thanks Kaye, it’s so hard not to over react and shock them but like you, I find it so hard, I’ve got better but still learning I guess. Thanks for reading and making me feel a but more normal 🙂 X

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  6. Ahhh, your friend sounds lovely and just the sort of person you need at times like that. There have been so many moments in our lives that I wish I’d handled differently but cut yourself some slack, you stopped your child from drowning! Don’t be put off, different mood, different day, different experience. 🙂 #bigpinklink

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    1. Thanks babe, it was all out of love but still knocked me later on and luckily I had my heroic buddy to save the nappy change. I’m learning to not take each one so personally now but still adjusting! Thanks for reading X

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  7. Don’t worry, mummy meltdowns come with the territory! My 13 month old is just finding out about temper tantrums and it’s such a learning curve for both mum and bub. It’s good your friend was there to provide support!

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    1. Thanks 🙂 it’s so hard when they just come out of no where and it happens quite quickly, around 13-14 months it was a BIG learning curve for us too, good luck and I’m so glad my friend was there and as a mum she just got what needed to be done! Thanks for reading X

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  8. Ah bless you. I’ve had a moment this week too, mine is 4 and realllllly pushing the boundaries lately. As a rule I don’t raise my voice but yesterday I yelled after being patient and trying to reason, and felt awful afterwards but we are all human! Last week we left a busy supermarket when he had a full on screaming meltdown over not being allowed a toy…fun! Being mummy is hard!! All you were doing is taking care of your baby, they just want to express themselves and don’t see the dangers or understand reason. Hugs x #PickNMix

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    1. Thanks for commenting babe, it’s nice to know I’m not alone and your so right they just don’t see the danger in anything and reasoning is impossible! Hope it’s all tantrum free your side X

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  9. Oh I’ve had loads of Mummy meltdowns over the years. At least you snapped out of it, sounds like you did really well. The worst is when you think you’ve totally ruined the day and then do actually ruin the day by dwelling on it! I’m a pro at doing that! Thanks for linking to #PickNMix

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    1. Thanks, i think it was because we were in public and I had a friend with me, I have had those “oh I’ve ruined it now” days but luckily I’m trying to work on it, as it only makes Phoebe upset as she picks up on my weird mood! Thanks for the comments and it’s been okay recently, well a few big ones but I’ve been calm and collected ( ignored her) X

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  10. My boys are 10 and almost 12 now and I still remember the toddler tantrums…. we all lose it sometimes and end up shouting, basically anyone with toddlers who is still vaguely sane is winning at life in my book 😉 Thanks for linking up to #PicknMix, hopefully see you there again tomorrow.

    Stevie x

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